I see that Calgary Restaurateurs are still mostly pig ignorant hillbilly clowns.

Strolling down 17th Avenue from 14th street to 4th, then down 4th to 23rd was a sore trial.

First I stopped at Home and Away at 17th and 13th. Pretty much empty at 11:40 AM on a gorgeous sunny Saturday.  I asked for and got a seat in the shade on the equally empty patio. I asked for and got a seat between the speakers to avoid the hellish sound system. Didn’t help. It took a long time to get served and the server did not know what the rotating tap beers were. She went to find out. A new one turned up and she knew the names of the beers but not where they were from. I gambled and won on a good IPA out of Vancouver. I declined to order food, drank my beer, paid my bill and left, not being able to stand the “music”.

From then on every single eatery on the south, shady, side of 17th had shrieking, howling speakers. I do not believe that any of them, or any other restaurant in this benighted hellhole for hospitality, offer a quiet space or room. Their owners all believe that we are extremely anxious to hear young man shouting rhythmically about fuckin’ hos or rockers screaming tunes most of us have heard a million times, and didn’t much like after the first fifty hearings. And they think we want it loud, good and loud.

Except for Starbucks, which seemed quiet, and which was full. Do you lumpheads get it? Quiet and full. Starbucks even has the burden of shitty coffee and inedible baked goods to overcome.

Back when I worked in the restaurant business my manager explained grimly that if I was comfortable then my customers were not, that he cared about the comfort of the customers and did not care about mine, that the customers did not want to hear the crap I called music, nor did they care if I was hot and sweaty from working hard, I should keep the heat turned up and shut up.

Finished at La Boulangerie which was bearable as for sound. Great coffee, lousy lunch. Sausage roll with carmelized onions and red peppers. It should have been microwaved then the pastry crisped up in  a hot oven. Instead I got cold sausage, and soggy pastry, with cold onions and peppers feeling slimy. The waitress who brought it out to me looked at me like I was a lunatic when I asked her for cutlery and literally told me to get it myself.

If restaurateurs are aiming to keep the bulk of the over 40 crowd out they are doing everything right.